"Karen," Smoker's voice almost broke as he regarded her sadly. She was wearing one of her beautiful sad smiles again that he loved and hated so much. His promise to make her genuinely smile in joy more seemed hollow just then. He kept his hands firmly at his sides, not reaching out to brush her cheek as he desperately wanted to.

He was never going to feign acceptance at this, never going to be okay with letting her go, never going to be able to pretend he could just flip a switch inside himself and stop loving her. Watching her at dinner, laughing at Zenigata's antics was going to drive a knife into him. But he was still the commander, the captain of the ship. He owed it to them to remain strong in any storm. "I'll come," he said softly, seriously. "But only if you are as well." He hadn't even asked her what she wanted to do about living arrangements. She had her own room, would she want to leave the marines over this? Simply vacation somewhere else. Right around the holidays too. Hm. Plenty of time to ask her later, when he'd had a few drinks and didn't feel like breaking a ship with his jitte.