Most religions teach that you can't go to heaven without actually wanting to. I realize that sounds silly since most people wouldn't NOT want to but it's kind of like not wanting to be angry. Sometimes you feel like you have no choice but to be angry but sometimes despite being an unpleasant feeling, people want to hold onto that anger for some reason or another.
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Maybe there's something you're holding onto.
Most religions teach that you can't go to heaven without actually wanting to. I realize that sounds silly since most people wouldn't NOT want to but it's kind of like not wanting to be angry. Sometimes you feel like you have no choice but to be angry but sometimes despite being an unpleasant feeling, people want to hold onto that anger for some reason or another.