Joy.

[justicereigns]

I'm aware you're all sick of the unicorns. Deal with it, it's not as though I asked for this to happen. To whatever idiot thought it would be cute to send my ensign a pie, come forward now if you want leniency. Apparently the stories about unicorns wanting to protect innocent maidens and virgins is true. So do me a favor and if you fall into the category, stay the fuck away from me or I'll take a leaf from the leopard's book and trample you. First person to make a crack about my horn being cleft like a jitte god damn it gets the honor of being choked, thrown in my brig and force-fed the remaining pie.

That is all.

Comments

[justicereigns]

Damn it. You're both virgins, aren't you?

[tapdancinskelly.livejournal.com]

Hey! I have a son I'll have you know! Yohohoho!

[kineticjustice.livejournal.com]

Can I... feed you if I see you?

[justicereigns]

........

I'm finding it REALLY hard to say no.

[kineticjustice.livejournal.com]

Thank you! What would you like to eat though?

[justicereigns]

... Pie. Ironically.

[kineticjustice.livejournal.com]

But unicorns don't...

...What about carrots?

[justicereigns]

Carrot cake? Whatever. It's fine.