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[Ace is a crown prince of shitty life choices, questionable ideas, and dammit this is one that he should have kept in the bag. But he can't help it, Smoker has his daughter back and while he was a father before he's actively one now. And the idea of calling him daddy to tease him is all but screaming at him.

And he's got no self control, so the text goes out fast.]

Hi daddy. [And almost immediately after.] Are you happy that you get to be a parent again?

Edited 2019-04-22 04:47 (UTC)

Yes.

She's half yours, you know. So try not to drop her on her head like your baby brother. I'd hate to see her lose whatever brains she got in spite of constantly trying to play with fire like me disappear too suddenly.

[But he's teasing.]

[...No reaction worth getting. He thought there would be more to it.

To give up, or try harder? This is the dilemma. Worse, it's really hitting him that this is a big deal, and he needs to step up to the plate. Maybe. But he's barely out of his teens, and dammit, he doesn't know how to human well. Much less adult and parent.] She's a big girl, she'll be okay. But give me a second, this is a conversation that shouldn't be had over text, since she's *ours*.

[Ace is sitting on his bed again, undressed save for some tiny shorts that really have no business actually being considered outerwear. As far as what the video shows, he might as well be naked.] So I really need to be around, I gotta do this parenting thing right. But damn, it's hard to figure this out. [Ace sighs.] She's not a little kid, and she doesn't know me at all... But we've got this, we'll help her adjust and be there if she needs anything. That's what parents do, right? [Ace is actually serious about this part.] I'll take good care of her. Promise.

[His entire stance relaxes, and he pulls out the full stop sexy brat mode. His hair is already messed up, his expression is nothing less than naughty, and his voice is low and all but dripping with sex when he speaks again.] And I'll take even better care of you, daddy.

[Shit. He was kind of hoping to keep Portgas distracted from thinking too hard about it with light joking.]

[VIDEO WAS A MISTAKE. VIDEO WAS SUCH A MISTAKE!!!!]

[Smoker coughs, chokes, and falls off his bed in a scramble to get the door and lock it, and then the comm.]

[aslkdjalisdjaslidjalsidjasdlkj]

[Words. Words words words...]

You're overthinking it. She's your age, idiot.

[RUBS HIS FUCKING FACE WITH A GLOVED HAND...]

[AND LIGHTS UP CIGARS... ONLY HALF LOOKING AND 100% RED LOBSTER.]

[Sob sob. He is the best parent. Clearly.]

[CLEARLY.]

[He knows Ace is just fucking with him AND YET--]

Edited 2019-04-22 05:17 (UTC)

[Hand over face for a bit. HE WANTS TO WATCH ACE BUT YANNO. GEARS. SWITCHING. GAH.]

She doesn't know me either, but that's never stopped us before.

[PEEKS AN EYE OUT.] What are you doing, Portgas?

Edited 2019-04-22 05:17 (UTC)

[HE IS EATING ALL OF THIS UP. Oh damn, this is the best reaction he's gotten from Smoker so far. And he's going to just keep up the bratty twink act for as long as it benefits him, because this is just too good.] We're parents together. We should do some bonding, so we're on the same page. [Catching his lower lip in his teeth gently for a moment, and lets it go with a sigh.] I mean, I wanna do this right. [A pause.] With you.

[DOUBLE FACEPALM.]

Portgas.

[His ears are probably smoking.]

[Any other day he'd almost admire the sheer fucking audacity.]

What, you don't like it? [He's absolutely having a blast, this is the most fun he's had in a while.] You're definitely father material.

[BRIGHT RED AGAIN!!!!!]

Hardly.

When I said I wanted to look after G5 like Whitebeard did for pirates like you, I didn't mean as a parent.

C'mon, don't you like it when I call you daddy? [He might be arching up just a little, trying to pass it off as a normal stretch.] 'Cause I could be so good for you. And you know I'm in need of some guidance.

You are definitely in need of guidance.

And possibly a good spanking.

You didn't say if you liked it or not. [Sliding his hand down his hairless chest, so slowly, and then out of sight.] You gonna give me a little discipline? Turn me over a knee? [He's in full on young and trouble mode now. Not that it wasn't there before, but spankings. He's not sure that he's into the idea, but he would happily give it a chance.]

Edited 2019-04-22 06:28 (UTC)

[DEFINITELY watching.] Yeah. Both. Take your lap front down in mine and give you a sharp smack. Maybe more than one since it'd take a bit to make any lessons with you stick.

[No, he won't, it's not Smoker's style, but he's kind of amused by this, and he isn't even pretending he's not.]

And then make sure you're nice and sensitive there and can't sit properly or even stand just right without thinking of me and my touch.

[This is a damn challenge now.] A good daddy shouldn't hurt his boy too much. Be careful with me. [He's still unsure on the idea of actually getting spanked, he's not a literal kid or anything, but damn the fact that he's getting Smoker to play along is a plus. This still feels a little weird to him, he's got massive parent based issues as is, but god the reactions are worth it.] You don't have to spank me to keep my mind on you. I think about you all the time.

[BLANDLY:] Yeah, I think fucking you would just be a lot easier.

Seriously? Come on, I'm putting on a show and you're not even playing along. [Ace huffs.] You need to get on that, I'm starting to get impatient. You're gonna get an even dirtier show next time, if I don't pounce before then. [Ace shakes his head.] So is the daddy thing hot or not? I don't wanna push it if you're not into it.

[Oh no. He adores this stupid brat and will fight everyone and everything to keep him to himself and never share.]

[Absolute favorite brat.]

Portgas... you could call me anything, and I'd find it hot. [Well, not so much the schoolgirl thing. He has limits. BUT ANYTHING ELSE.] So long as you're calling me.

[Oh god why is it so easy for Smoker to turn it back onto him with just a little sincerity? Ace is so weak against him, and he's pink cheeked and flustered at that response.] Well I'm gonna keep calling you.

I really want this, you know that. But it's not a joke, and it's not just for sex. I mean, I wanna know what you like. What turns you on, so I can make you feel good and please you. Both in bed and out of it.

[Ace is just a little fidgety, it's easy for him to sell the huge sexual savant act when he's the one doing it alone, but the moment Smoker says a word with any sort of push behind it Ace melts. And he's struggling now to decide if he wants to force this to go further, or if he's going to keep himself well behaved and not push Smoker.]

I want you so bad, it kinda hurts. Just hearing your voice makes me feel kinda crazy. [His chest rises and falls with the effort of more excited breathing, and he's still red in the face. ] I know I tease you, but it's because I need that, y'know? I wanna see how much you want me. Makes me feel good somehow.

[But he feels like this is too much vulnerable, too much sweetness. He's rolled over and showed a lot of his metaphorical belly in this talk already. So the brat comes back out once more.] C'mon daddy, don't neglect me. I'm giving you a lot to work with here.

Edited 2019-04-22 08:13 (UTC)

[Text] The day after Adela arrives I'M SO SO SO SORRY

[Text] I AM ALL BUT CRYING TEARS OF JOY :VVV

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