justicereigns | Rock Stacking at the River / Action & Picture

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Rock Stacking at the River / Action & Picture

[Smoker might have gone a bit on a bender. One of those "everything is wrong, let's just drink into oblivion" kinds. Justice isn't what it ought to be, pirates are turning into heroes and even Smoker isn't as good at hunting through people's hearts as he thought. Vergo was adjusting his newspapers and Smoker didn't even catch on. That was why he needed Tashigi, and she wasn't here. So here in Luceti, Smoker couldn't tell enemy from from friend anymore. At least not on a grand scale. Malnosso? Third Party? Too many factions, too many wildcards. He thought he could just ignore those factions and focus on what was directly at hand, but that's becoming less and less of an option. Option? What options?]

[So he's drinking.]

[And you know what Smoker does when he drinks? He stacks rocks.]

[Sure, that sounds benign enough, but that would be a serious underestimation of Smoker's love for going overboard.]

Now this is what you can do with non-defective rocks! [He is just so proud.]

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Why don't you go build your own ship if you want one?

[He knows Smoker doesn't want it because of that, but he said that stacking rocks was better than reading. That's not something he wants to think about right now. He lets Smoker pile up new stacks, he stays having "fun" kicking the ones he already finished.]

Do I look like a shipwright to you?

[OI. THAT WAS HIS BEST STACK! Smoker quickly sends out a snake-like whip of white smoke to grab Ikki's ankle and tug him in retaliation. Of course, Smoker's a little drunk, so his vision's probably shit. Oops.]

Right now you look like a drunk sailor no one in their right mind would let on a ship. Let alone be in charge of a city's military.

[Ikki snarls at the smoke on his ankle and burns his Cosmo to try to shake it off -and bring down another stack with it-, glad that it is so similar to "haki". It's always a relief to know that you can punch your friend in the face even if he's made of smoke.]

[Snorts.] Better than a cat with a burr in its fur.

[YEAH THAT'D BE YOU.]

[Have some more smoke tentacles to fend off!]

[Have more Cosmo flames, not that the flames hurt Smoker but hell if the Cosmo shouldn't. Want to turn this into a fight? He's ok with it, though he only came to pick on the rocks.]

Actually you look like that too, except that you have it up your ass rather than on your fur.

Hey, I'm a loose hound, not a fussy kittycat!

[Dance Ikki dance! Smoker weaves the smoke tentacles around the rocks and over them to try to jab Ikki without him being able to determine where Smoker's coming from.]

Get it right.

A loose hound? More like a discarded blind mongrel.

[Ikki doesn't dance, his Cosmo does though. If he can't know where Smoker will be coming from, which is harder than what one would expect when dealing with a drunk, he will just surround himself in Cosmos and burn it. Smoker would do well in remember their very first encounter and how huge Ikki's radius can get even inside the barrier.]

[Luckily it doesn't burn the trees or Smoker so Smoker just keeps it up, letting his smoke darts get more haphazard and ridiculous.]

Same thing, isn't it? Besides I don't need to see to do this. [AND SO HE CLOSES HIS EYES.]

[Um.]

[He might be knocking over a few of his own rocks now.] Huh. That wasn't your shin, right? [Because you know... shins are hard, but cracking shins would be bad.]

[Ikki just laughs loudly as Smoker knocks his own rocks.]

I thought you were trying to make me stop from knocking over your stacks, not joining me on it.

[Peeks an eye open and swears.]

Well fuck.

I meant to do that. [No he didn't.]

Of course you did, who could think otherwise? It's not as if you're drunk or anything.

[/Sarcasm.]

I'm not.

[Waves a hand back and forth and it's you know... a smoke snake so it would knock over another rock stack, but he quickly shifts into thinner smoke so it just passes by.] I only had a few.... bottles.

I'm well within my limit. [Nod!]

You mean the limit of being drunk but not unconscious, right? Yes, I know that limit well.

[Kicking another stack while Smoker doesn't look.]

Tch.

This place bites. There's no way to forget people who leave generally and then it's like now what? all the time.

So I decided, now I'm gonna stack rocks. [HUFF and points.] And I did. And I'm gonna.

[Smoker should have never called Selphie a pipsqueak. It's a golden rule of living with a short person and the duo will likely hear Hyoga barking in the background before the wolf and Selphie happen upon the location of their roommates. She skids to a halt before putting her hands on her knees to catch her breath before thrusting a hand at the grumps with the intent of using some of the small amount of magic she has from home.]

WATER!

[YOU PUT OUT HIS CIGARS!]

[Fizzle.]

[Fizzle.]

[Dead.]

I don't think I deserved that.

[Sulk.]

[Ikki doesn't have cigars to put out. And his Cosmo flames don't even flail at the water spell, so he takes the sudden "rain" like a boss. Arms crossed and glaring at Smoker.]

You did.

[And then he glares at Selphie.]

I'm not sure why I deserved it too, though.

For kicking over Justice city.

[Two grumpy men really know how to bring out Selphie's deadpan bluntness, don't they?]

Because you're both being idiots. So it's time to stop ruining everybody's fun, quit acting like five years olds and let's go home already.

I don't wanna.

Justice City won't just rebuilt itself after the great phoenix attack of '93.

Says the one who came and threw a water bucket at us.

[Kicking another stack, see what he does with your Justice city.]

That was magic, dummy and if you keep kicking those rocks over, there's gonna be a blizzard spell with your name on it.

[Selphie's wondering why she's being the mature one here. Boys.]

Smoker, get up. That's an order.

I DON'T TAKE ORDERS.

[Gawd Selphie. Worst words you could use with Smoker. Smoker talks back to his bosses. In the marines. Guess how well he's taking to it now.]

[Yup. Stubbornly sitting there. You can't make him move!]

What, would you prefer me joining the drunk ranks? Because that's where I was heading before this happened.

[Also a blizzard hardly worries him.]

I'd rather that neither of you drink yourselves stupid.

[And then she focuses on Smoker with an impish grin in place.]

Well then. I guess you really do want me to pour all the rum down the drain.

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