justicereigns | [Audio]

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Nice of them to leave my jacket. [AWKWARD PAUSE. The voice coming from Smoker's journal account is not his usual. Or from a male at all.]

What's with my voice?! [That just squeaks there in high-pitched worry.]

Ah hell... I have boobs.

Fuck you Malnosso.

[He... she rather, clears her voice.]

S-Smoker is back... [That's a bit hesitant.] Ikki, he... he might need help. Jitte and kickboxing lessons will return to normal, sorry everyone about the delay. Could I have a headcount of everyone still wishing to take them? I might need to reorganize his schedules.

[The last part is muffled as he starts to shut the journal.]

Damn it! These jeans are way too big! Now what?!

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[...

Silence.

For over a month.

And the big bad, extraordinarily gruff but surprisingly reasonable jitte-wielding Marine with a fondness for cigars is back...

as a woman???

Pardon Lupin while he laughs. Yes, it does hurt. No, he has no regrets.]

[You know what's hard to do as almost half your height and weight, and minus all the gruff intimidating appearance? Swear at pirates and adequately scare them. His heart is barely in it.]

Fuck off asshole. [Lighting up more cigars now. And trying to figure out how to stomp around in boots twice as big as he can really wear.]

But Cap'~~, it's me! You know me!

[He's not laughing now, but the echoes of it are still there in his voice.] --ow. Sorry. It's just...wow. This was unexpected!

[Glare and swear all you want, the Thief is just happy that the Marine is back, no matter her current shape or gender.]

And that is in improvement how? [Allow him/her to insinuate that it's because (s)he knows that there is no trust there. However, he pauses and tilts his head, focusing much bigger eyes on the sound. He's got canine hearing, and that hasn't gone away with gender.]

Why ow?

Edited 2012-02-15 19:47 (UTC)

[There's a pause as Lupin fiddles with the filters. Despite their general dislike of eachother, he figures that Smoker is a trustworthy person. Recent decisions have made him realize that he probably should take the time to make himself more well rounded overall...

He's just thinking, though. He'd rather not tell too many people what he's thinking.]

...nothing much, just got into a brawl and got banged up. I was thinking, if you're cool with it, that maybe I'd get more serious about things.

Once you're settled in, of course. No rush. You all okay, aside from the..uh..boobs?

Edited 2012-02-15 19:51 (UTC)

[Excuse his moment of flustered hell. He has no idea how to handle this. Where is the fear?! Where is the "oh man I just can't deal with this grumpy asshole" attitude? Anyways, moving on...]

Tch. "Okay" is relative. As I have never been a woman before, having always avoided Ivankov for this reason. [AND HE HAS NO PANTS. And trying to get to the store to get something is hard since he doesn't know what to wear either. Also, is it really okay to leave the jacket unzippered like this? Would anyone care in this place? Maybe he should ask Ikki, but that would seriously change the nature of their bro-ship in which they enjoy each other's silence and appreciation of justice.]

Talk and I'll listen.

Uh...I have convincingly dressed as a woman before. I can give you a hand with some things...

[He's just talking here, wheeling himself away from the subject that he himself brought up. There's a sigh--maybe it was time to stop playing this week and just listen to people for once. Bed rest...really was a good idea.

...but there was that bottle of rum he picked up and stashed away weeks ago, one that he wouldn't mind sharing with the Captain if the opportunity arose.

It was a tempting thought.]

I mean about our game. I was thinking that maybe I should stop playing, is all.

[Flushes at the offer. He's not keen on taking advice from a criminal >:|]

Bras aren't really that necessary, right? Since it's temporary. And bars are just for the look. Or whatever. [This is a real question Lupin-wan-kenobi. Help him, you're his only hope.]

Tsk. Good. It wasn't that fun anyway. [Tsun tsun.]

But I liked them...[whine. whine. He really did enjoy the few weeks that they played. He still might continue, but he knew he needed to get serious if he ever wanted to bloody Tony Stark's face.]

And Cap'? That depends--how big are they, and do you want them jiggling everytime you move?

It was annoying. If a pirate wants to get caught he should just --

[Oh. My. God. Excuse Smoker choking on her cigars and going bright red, practically swallowing them.]

That--!

THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

[Throws the journal at a tree. Fuck his life.]

Hey~~!! You're the one who asked!!

[Eventually he gets back after cooling down.]

I don't know. Big. My jacket is big enough to cover them though. So.

That's fine. Isn't it? [Nope, still bright fucking red though.]

You know? My girlfriend would agree with your fashion sense.

[There's a pause.] ...I've got this bottle of rum here I'd be willing to share if you want a few drinks sometime.

Edited 2012-02-15 20:21 (UTC)

You have a girlfriend? [He cannot even hide the shock. What kind of a person dates Lupin? Wait, he doesn't want to go there given his own past history of dating.]

What? Oh yeah rum would be-- [Oh you so almost got him... except now he's straight back into suspicious.] I thought you said you were going to stop playing games. [He's confused. Why else would you want to drink with him? :|]

Sorta. Maybe? I dunno anymore. [Such conflict...] She's awesome to be around though.

...and I wasn't playing~! I was just thinking it'd be better to talk in person, is all! [Okay. Maybe playing was involved in there too--he wanted to see Cap's boobs.]

Sounds stable. [Still sarcastic of course.]

[Well don't tell him the part about boobs, or he'll never come.] About what? [Lie and tell him it's something super super serious at least, jeez.]

Oh, I dunno...not playing? [He doesn't trust his doctor enough to not tie him down, he'd rather talk about it in person...

and he will try valiantly to not stare too hard if those boobs are as impressive as he thinks.]

You said you were done, what more needs saying?

[Lure him in.]

I...uh...

[he takes a deep breath--]

[--and releases, his mind clearer under the icy glare he could almost feel thorugh the audio feed.]

--look. I want to be discreet about it is all. My buddies will wonder what the hell I'm thinking and...

uh. I kinda got more banged up than I implied, and my doctor is threatening to sedate me or tie me to a bed. One is unethical, the other won't work.

Can you help me be a little discreet here?

Oh. Fine. Doctors are always bossy. I take it this means you didn't want to use any of the filial healing magic? [Or it wouldn't take so long.]

Where do you want to meet?

The power thing is cool--I get that. The magic thing...? [He sighs] I've fought men who call themselves magicians. I could replicate their tricks with no problem. This?

...this is different.

[He could count immortal midgit madmen and supposed time travellers amongst his enemies. He's fought men to attain pieces of extraterrestrial metal. But all this magic stuff?

He didn't quite get it.

It was something strange, and also something he didn't want to be come reliant on.]

...if you're comfortable with walking through town, we could meet at the barracks? It's quiet and discreet there.

We don't really have magic in my world either. [Forgive him being ever so slightly more talkative. He hasn't had anyone to talk to in a month and a half after all.] Devil fruits, but those can be explained and studied through science. And have been.

[Smoker, like Fujiko, counts wind magic as an exception thanks to Val. Since she was his sister during an event, and wind is one of his only weaknesses, so it pays to be on her best side.]

Barracks is always comfortable. [He'd live there if he didn't like his roommate so much.] Meet you there then. Bring the rum. I could use a drink.

[The talkative factor was a little mystifying for Lupin, but understandable. He had no idea what went on during 'naps, really, but anyone would want to talk again to even a person they didn't like after six weeks of enforced silence.]

I'll see you there.

[And he does. He'll be waiting in the building when Smoker arrives, his apartment in Community House 5 being closer geographically than most other places in town. The bottle of rum of a brand-name he didn't recognize would be sitting on a table, along with a pair of glass tumblers. No need for ice--it was already cold enough.

As for Lupin? He's leaning back in a chair Jigen-style, his scarf and gloves folded up haphazardly under his chair.]

Edited 2012-02-15 21:32 (UTC)

[Smoker will be a little late, having needed to check in with his roommate in order to find how to get home, and of course, get clothes. For now, assume he's wearing more size-appropriate boots and jeans. Fuck zippering the jacket though. Right now, he's being stubborn and refusing to change himself too much just because of the Malnosso messed with him. It would be like giving up.]

Oh... hey... is that Rhum? [He's a little excited. It's been almost a year since he had his favorite brand. His birthday in fact, when he got drunk and finished off the bottle and a rum cake. He really likes rum. And yes, Rhum sounds like it reads, silent H. But he picks up the bottle to inspect it closer. This would be Lupin's only chance to get a closer look at those boobs without Smoker instantly noticing.]

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