justicereigns | [Audio]

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Nice of them to leave my jacket. [AWKWARD PAUSE. The voice coming from Smoker's journal account is not his usual. Or from a male at all.]

What's with my voice?! [That just squeaks there in high-pitched worry.]

Ah hell... I have boobs.

Fuck you Malnosso.

[He... she rather, clears her voice.]

S-Smoker is back... [That's a bit hesitant.] Ikki, he... he might need help. Jitte and kickboxing lessons will return to normal, sorry everyone about the delay. Could I have a headcount of everyone still wishing to take them? I might need to reorganize his schedules.

[The last part is muffled as he starts to shut the journal.]

Damn it! These jeans are way too big! Now what?!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[STOPS. AND. STARES. Did Smoker almost say what he thought he almost said.

Y E P. Shit-eating grin.] Oh, I'll definitely hold you to that. Hopefully I won't embarrass myself as much as you, though. [Pokes her cheek.] I've never seen anyone blush this much.

[And he is going to side eye that shirt being unzipped. ~~Just yank it down, god.~~]

[Blushes forever. FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER. Oh god he can't look at that grin. He seriously doesn't remember those grins getting to him this much before.]

I didn't mean it. [Mumbled and debates pulling the zipper back up... yeah he's going to just... nudge it up... a little...]

And I don't blush! [...] That much. [Making it worse... And he just gulps.] Are they really that--? [Glances down at his boobs trying to appraise them for hotness levels and failing... then realizing what the fuck he just did in front of Ace. WELL this day can't get worse.]

Oi. [Tries for a flat stare at Ace.] Eyes up here. [Oh... but the blushing. AND YUP BEET RED. You know what? He's just going to give up on life.] No wait. That's bad too.

Stupid pirates... Why couldn't you be a marine?

[.... This was a train wreck of epic proportions. Did he basically just say all of this attention would have been welcome if Ace wasn't a pirate? YUP. And technically, how much is Ace even a pirate now? And did he just try to mentally justify Portgas D. Ace again? Fuck his life.] Not... that that would make it better...

[He is not going to laugh, he's not going to laugh, he's not going t-- shit, he's chuckling. He's going to hide those behind his hand and try not to burst into laughter and make Smoker feels worse.

Even though that would be hilarious.] I never thought I would see you this flustered. Now I've seen everything. Shit, I wish I had a vision dial.

[He attempts a growl, which even to Smoker, sounds cuter than it should be.]

Keep it up and I'll make you flustered, brat.

Oh yeah? [He gets his face quite close to hers, leaning over her a bit to add for... idk suspense or intensity. Yeah. He tilts her chin up a little.]

I'd like to see you try.

[Stubbornly keeps right on tsun-ing in Ace's direction, even leaning a little closer? Did Ace really think he could be scared off like that? Hell no, he wasn't going to let the Malnosso or some stupid freckled pirate get the best of him. And wow he can practically count the freckles this close. And oh, it's very unsettling to be smaller than Ace. For the record.]

I don't think you would, and then you'd run away and I wouldn't get what I came here for. [But damn it boy, he's not getting it now anyway, and you're getting on his last nerve. >:| So drastic times call for drastic measures. And fidgeting a little, Ace is really close. And Smoker does a rare thing... and removes the cigar. Dramatically.]

[Oh, she got rid of the cigar. Well, he can't waste this. He leans closer, mouth barely an inch away from hers. He speaks in a whisper.]

I don't run away, remember? [And he finally leans in to kiss her. ~~Ooooooh, so this is why people ship them.~~]

[Well. Okay. Damn. That wasn't something Smoker was counting on at all. At all. Yeah, kissing Ace to shut him the fuck up had been his plan, but he didn't know what to do now that Ace did it instead. Other than kiss him back because that whisper and those moves... damn he was good. Smooth operator there, it probably killed with the ladies back home. Even Smoker had to admit... there was a definite charm to it. Smoker already knows he's going to hate himself in a week, but the kiss is already happening, he's not going to be a coward either. Let a pirate scare him? No way.

So he leans up and kisses back, vaguely bemused by how it really is different as a girl. He's not used to NOT having scruff or being rough or the size of his own lips and how they're softer, or any of it. And vaguely he notices things like Ace being superhumanly warm and the smell of a campfire and -- oh god he's kissing a pirate, and he's a girl! -- for the first time EVER, Smoker might be glad he won't remember Luceti back home.

Still... he can't just sit there... like a girl... like someone not himself... So he reaches a hand to Ace's throat and tugs him down by the red beads, to make it more forceful and to exert some control over the situation, though Smoker was quickly beginning to accept he had none.

~~And yes... even people who don't ship them at all have a hard time keeping them from USTing all over.~~]

[To be honest, he didn't expect Smoker to kiss back, much less pull him down by the beads and kiss harder. He smiled a little into the kiss, and tugged her closer, wrapping an arm around her waist. He tried to get his brain to think a little more on what the hell was happening, but it couldn't quite work. Suddenly "what the fuck are you doing" came in, and he pulled away just a bit. He couldn't completely separate, though. Not yet.

~~WELP.~~]

[That's okay, when Ace's arm slips around him, Smoker starts to freak out and pulls back, flushing and looking away.]

That was just....

[Now that he's apart, breathing, and thinking, he doesn't really care what it was. So what if he kissed Portgas? The pirate started it. The reasons didn't matter. If it was a problem he wouldn't do it again. Still, she frowns and stubbornly puts the cigar back.]

Portgas... [Low voice and tone, suddenly keenly aware of everything and everyone in the bar, voices flooding to reach his keen hearing.] Go for a walk with me. Unless you don't trust yourself to handle it? [He practically sneers, both referencing the kiss and the previous claims that they had to have witnesses so Smoker wouldn't kill Ace. As it was... he'd already had too much to drink. Clearly. Clearly. And he wasn't going through the effort of the horribly awkward conversation, getting hit on, kissing Ace, and asking him to stay only to walk away confused and empty-handed. Hadn't Smoker reached a decision in his captivity?] I can't talk here. And I need to stretch after the last month and a half. [His face shows the pain of swallowing his pride to admit that, big eyes glancing away. Well Ace would get it right? He wasn't just asking because of the kiss, and Ace had been in Impel Down, he'd know how it was. And then Smoker messed up and reached for Ace's hand. To drag him out, he told himself, but had it been anyone else under any other circumstances, he was certain he wouldn't have done that.]

[He stares at her for a moment, and the looks away himself. Should he really have done that...? She glances back and shakes his head.] I'll keep my hands to myself.

[Grabbing his hand totally took him by surprise, and he just followed for a while before pulling his hand away.] I know the feeling of being cooped up. Go crazy.

[...just not with him.]

[Shivers and goes for a walk outside, once they're away from enough people, he'll unzip again. Because fuck shirts, that's why. And he doesn't care what Ace thinks of him. Or so he keeps telling himself.]

This place... [He'd been cooped up too long, that's all there was to it.]

You told me once that fighting just because we're marine and pirate is stupid. You still think that applies? [Freshens his cigars to allow him time to pause and let everything sink in.]

[He puts his hands in his pockets and really thinks about this. If he meant here, then...]

Here... yeah, it's stupid. What would we accomplish by fighting here? Nothing. [He shakes his head.] It's pointless.

Good. [Relieved note and drops the hands from his face, looking up with bigger eyes than normal. Looking up. He was never going to get used to this.]

I need...

Someone equal. [After the kiss the whole thing seems more intimate than he wants to admit.] For training. [His ears are bright red, though with luck it'll be dark enough not to be too easily observed. And he just mumbles, kicking some snow.] You're the only equal I've got.

[He's pretty surprised by the sudden confession. He never thought he'd hear those words come from Smoker. But still, he needs help.]

Sure, if you want. I need to be kept busy, anyway.

[That was almost too easy. In his head, Smoker had worked it up to be some big deal that he'd have to talk Ace into. He's almost disappointed. He had words planned. And Smoker doesn't prepare words!]

Just like that?!

[Was their enmity really that one-sides all along?]

Aren't you worried about me using it to catch your brother?

[Granted, it was the same argument Smoker had already had with himself, that he could get stronger without Ace, but not here in stupid Luceti, and he wasn't going to catch Luffy here so it was moot. Still though, Portgas' instant acceptance had thrown him off.]

Is it the boobs? [Practically flashes Ace by gesturing down now that they're unzipped.] Because they'll be gone in a week or two, whenever the Malnosso get bored. Sooner if I can manage it. [Huffs and folds his arms, looking up at Ace expectantly awaiting his answers.]

Tch. [He just rolls his eyes.] Would you rather I put up a fight?

[He shoots him a wary glance.] "Know your enemy first" or something, right? If I know your moves, I can stop them whenever you try to get Luffy.

[YOU GET A LOOK AT THAT, SMOKER. Seriously. It's not just the boobs.] No, it's not. But hell, it can be, if you want. You're acting like you like me, so... [Shrugs.]

I'm not going to catch Straw-Hat here, it'd be pointless--

ACTING LIKE I LIKE YOU?! [Normally it'd be thundered, now it's just sort of squeaked.] You wish! I wouldn't chase you if you were the last pirate here! Or anywhere! [Kicks his shins. Because that is what tsundere people do with people they have no interest in. Like. Totally.]

[And then he just bursts into laughter, the kick not even fazing him.]

Well, looks like I was right. Don't worry, I'm sure it'll go away when you're back to normal.

[He's gonna try to punch that smug smirk right off Ace's face. Stupid sexy smirks. HAVE AT THEE!]

Right nothing! [Another cute growl.]

[He ducks and swerves to come behind her.]

Yeah, I'm completely wrong. Exactly why you're trying to hit me.

It is!

[Vaguely wonders how Ace moved that fast, but decides that's the only advantage to this smaller body, so kicks out behind him aiming for Ace's legs.]

If I had a crush on you, I'd try to kiss you, not punch you! And I don't kiss pirates! [Despite what your memory of 5 minutes ago might lead you to believe :|]

[Blocks the kick. And just stares. DID YOU FORGET WHAT JUST HAPPENED.

Sure, he started the kiss, but hey, you kissed back. So yes. This is a look.]

[Luckily for Smoker, this type of look has no effect on him. Unlike the grins. So he follows up with another punch, just not letting up the attacks.

Smoker also, apparently, takes no responsibility for what his evil sister did when he wasn't looking.

He also hasn't zipped up again either so he's pretty much flashing way too much with every turn. ~~This is why bras are a good thing.~~ However, since Ace hasn't been taking any extra notice or getting distracted, he's starting to think maybe Ace just -gasp- meant the things he said before, which does nothing to quell Smoker's tiny fists of raaage.]

[And he will just keep dodging, smirk on his face all the while.

And you know, it's hard not to look at those giant boobs when they keep coming right in your face. So he's going to stop, and look her in the face.]

You should probably zip up your jacket now.

[Action] >:3

[Action] lkajsdlaksjd

[Action] this is hideiously beautiful

[Action] SO MUCH

[Action] RIGHT

[Action] Let's bury them, yes?

[Action] I've got the shovels.

[Action] I've got the dirt

[Action] Okay, sweet. Ace still gets a pretty grave, though.

[Action] The prettiest

[Action] yaaaay

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