justicereigns | [Audio]

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Nice of them to leave my jacket. [AWKWARD PAUSE. The voice coming from Smoker's journal account is not his usual. Or from a male at all.]

What's with my voice?! [That just squeaks there in high-pitched worry.]

Ah hell... I have boobs.

Fuck you Malnosso.

[He... she rather, clears her voice.]

S-Smoker is back... [That's a bit hesitant.] Ikki, he... he might need help. Jitte and kickboxing lessons will return to normal, sorry everyone about the delay. Could I have a headcount of everyone still wishing to take them? I might need to reorganize his schedules.

[The last part is muffled as he starts to shut the journal.]

Damn it! These jeans are way too big! Now what?!

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[Yeah, he's grateful for those boxers.]

If they were going to throw you out like this they could have done the job properly and have given you appropriate clothes.

[Like a dress, you know.]

I didn't say that. I said I wouldn't accept any Valentine's chocolate.

[Whatever.] You don't seem wounded.

[Smoker will fight kicking and screaming to avoid that dress. >:|]

I have breasts. [Points to them like they are the wound. Or leeches. Or something. And also like Ikki wouldn't have known until he said it.] And I was lost. And I don't have pants. [Huffs on his cigars and folds his arms.]

Why not anyone's? Hate the holiday on principle? [He doesn't remember you hating it too much last year, but then he does remember there was some sort of reason to... wasn't there?]

I would have never guessed. I would have brought pants but I don't think any of them will sit you now either.

[Well, not anyone's, Kotomi's chocolate was accepted happily.]

No. I just don't need to accept any of those.

[Anymore.]

Yeah... I need to get... girl jeans. I guess. [Excuse him as he estimates his height based on Ikki's size and how ridiculously bigger his jitte is now.] And gloves.

What does that mean? [Piercing slate grey-eyed look. Spill. Although this is even less effective than usual since his eyes are more "moe" and gigantic rather than piercing orbs of JUSTICE.]

[Ikki hums as he looks back at that piercing look.]

... You shouldn't try to do any of your usual work while you're like this. It's hard to take you seriously with those eyes.

[Said in all seriousness ever.]

Let's go and get you some clothes then.

[Mentally cries. Or mentally kills things. One of those. He feels like both. Female hormones are weird, okay?]

My eyes are different? [Well duh, they would be. But no, he hasn't seen a mirror yet so...]

Clothes would be good. You still have to tell me why. [How do women get information? Nagging??]

They are larger and rounder. Cuter as well, it's hard to know if you're glaring or giving a puppy look to rival Hyoga.

[Kind of. Anyway, moving on...]

Do you want to walk all the way back or should I teleport us both?

[Ignoring your questions, yes.]

[BLUSHES BRIGHT RED.] I -- I do not have puppy eyes. [Folds arms and hmphs.]

Teleport. Bad enough being a girl, I still need to get pants. [He refuses a skirt.]

What are you hiding anyway? [See his gratitude? It does substitute his curiosity though.]

Wait until you look at yourself in a mirror.

[Well, teleporting it is. It doesn't take long before they go from being surrounded by fire to be in front of the clothing store.]

I'm not hiding anything. I just don't have a particular reason to answer.

[And randomly Smoker is noting how tall Ikki is again. Damn she's short now.]

Really, because it sounded like something interesting happened. [Folds his arms again... trying to act normal but briefly hesitates since Ikki said not to try to do his normal things. How would a girl--? No... he can't. The only things that come to mind are the things Hina does. That would just be traumatic to try.]

[Screw it. If Ikki's not gonna tell him, he won't bug him. For now. So just looking around for jeans.]

We lost a weekend from the past month. I think that's about the most interesting thing that has happened.

[Waiting. No, he's not helping if you don't ask.]

Lost?? How?

[He wouldn't accept your help Ikki! >:| He is manly and independent and can pick out his own clothes. Badly if you've ever seen him in shorts; and later he wears two jackets, but still! He's going to be over here... looking at jeans and trying to remember what looks good on chicks. Maybe he should have asked Alice's help, since she'd dragged him clothes shopping before.]

No one remembers what happened in those two days. The memories are gone, wiped. I think last year something similar happened, but they like to play with our memories so much that it's hard to keep track of it.

Hn. Curious. I think I remember the whole you're talking about... what happened around that time though, anything?

They were normal days, Friday and Monday I mean. I have no clue on the weekend.

[Actually he lies. He was plagued with bad dreams, not nightmares but dreams that made him think things he didn't want to think about. Realize things he didn't want to accept. But Smoker wasn't there the day he threw Hyoga out of the apartment telling him to not return, only to have the animal bring people to him, so there's no point in telling him. No reason to.]

Whatever they did, they did a good job cleaning up after it.

[Awww Ikki ;;]

Maybe something happened they don't want us to know about. I mean they left the memory of the moon falling.

Not for everyone.

[Though he doesn't count as he was taken... Or so he assumes, why else wouldn't he remember it all?]

It could. Maybe it was a secret that they knew would get addressed at the Town Meeting.

[Grasping at straws.]

No point in breaking our heads for now about it. Did you find any pants or are too busy taking all the cute clothes you can find?

Cute clothes. [Dripping with sarcasm.] Pink flowers are all the rage right now.

[Returns with several pairs that still look too big.] I can't tell the difference between girl jeans or not. [Seriously. He doesn't get it.]

[He gives him... Her, a look.]

Probably the ones that are nicely folded rather than thrown around without care.

I would say that red frills suit you better though.

[Makes a face.] I hate red. Reminds me of Akainu.

[That and it emphasizes his blushes.] Okay. So these? [Brings Ikki a pair for inspection. :|] They look short. [Because Smoker is short.]

Who?

[He's guessing a pirate. He eyes the pair and then looks at Smoker.]

You are short.

An admiral. Believes in Absolute Justice. Kills civilians and marines, killed Portgas. Aokiji hates him too.

[Opens his mouth to object to the short comment, looks up... realizes he's looking up and grumbles, stubbornly taking the jeans to go try them on.]

Ah... That type. And he's still allowed around? He probably would have been brought down by his own doings in my world.

[This is why he doesn't like any structured organization, scum like that is bond to appear in some step of the ladder.]

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